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Griffon The Brush Off (PP6's version)
<--- My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic (PinkiePie6's version)/animated media Prologue (Opening shot: fade in to a stretch of park land on the outskirts of Ponyville during the day. Pan away from a small stream.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s., excitedly) Hoof-biting action overload! He was like a stunt superstar— (Stop on a fountain, next to which she is jumping up and down, and a bench, on which Sapphire Sparkle has settled down on her belly to read a book.) * Glitchy Pie: —flying higher and higher, and then Rainbow Beam swooped down, swoosh! (He zips o.s., then hops back.) And right before he hit the ground, shoom! (floating, then landing on hooves) He pulled up! Vroom! * Sapphire Sparkle: (paying no attention) Uh-huh. * Glitchy Pie: And then he looped around and around, like woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo! (He mimics the action with his head, eventually becoming so dizzy that he collapses to the ground.) * Sapphire Sparkle: Uh-huh. (The green pony has wound up on his back, giving him a good view of Rainbow Beam soaring overhead; he bounds up and races after the yellow flyer.) * Sapphire Sparkle: Phew! (She flips a page, using her teeth rather than magic, and keeps reading. Cut to Rainbow in flight.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Oh, Rainbow Beam! (His eyes pop as he notices Glitchy trotting along the park trail below, and he voices an annoyed little groan.) * Rainbow Beam: Glitchy Pie? Not again! (He comes up with a burst of speed that prompts the earthbound admirer to follow suit.) * Glitchy Pie: Rainbow Beam! * Rainbow Beam: Not now, Glitchy Pie! (More speed; Glitchy matches him.) * Glitchy Pie: But—but, Rainbow Beam! * Rainbow Beam: I’m in the middle of something! * Glitchy Pie: But— * Rainbow Beam: I said, not now! (His mid-air wind sprint ends very suddenly when he plows face first into a sheer rock wall. Zoom out to expose it as part of a very tall cliff, from which he slides down after sticking to it for a moment. He winds up in a heap, in front of Glitchy.) * Glitchy Pie: I was gonna tell you to look out for that mountain. (A groan of mixed pain and frustration from Rainbow. Fade to black.) OPENING THEME Act One (Opening shot: fade in to an overhead view of the town square pavilion. Zoom in slowly as Glitchy crosses the open area, humming to himself, then cut to a close-up and tilt up into the sky. Here, Rainbow is napping on a cloud; the humming wakes him up, so he stuffs a wad of cloud into each ear—but even this is not enough to block out the sound. Down below, Glitchy stops to address three ponies at a produce cart.) * Glitchy Pie: Hi! I’m looking for Rainbow Beam. Have you seen him? (Rainbow snaps bolt upright in a panic upon hearing this, the clouds falling away from his ears, and starts burrowing in to hide himself.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Hi there! Have you seen Rainbow Beam?...Okay, thanks anyway. (Ground level; he finds Sapphire outside a bookshop.) Sapphire! Have you seen Rainbow Beam anywhere? * Sapphire Sparkle: (pointing up) Isn’t he right up there? (Tilt quickly up to the cloud, from which only Rainbow’s rear half now protrudes vertically.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s., singsong) Rainbow Beam! (Up comes the striped mane, a wisp of cloud adhering to it over a truly freaked-out face. He looks one way, then another, and takes off with enough speed to pulverize the rest of the cloud. Glitchy, completely unfazed, begins hopping along the road after him at a leisurely pace. Rainbow streaks through the sky, punching holes in several clouds and buzzing over Sweet Apple Acres, and takes cover behind one corner of the barn. A peek around it shows the coast to be clear.) * Rainbow Beam: Phew! That was close. (Or maybe not, as seen when the turns to leave and finds the green wacko standing right in front of him.) * Glitchy Pie: Hi! (That one word is enough to get Rainbow flying again with a scream; this time, he rockets through the orchard, blowing a few apples loose—and here comes the equine pogo stick again. Rainbow makes a break for it through Ponyville proper and plunges into the tree branches of the library. This shot reveals the entire structure, including one top-floor detail not yet seen: the observatory platform attached to the highest limb is outfitted with a telescope.) (After a quick peek through the leaves, Rainbow begins to catch his breath and relax—only to find a moment later that he is actually sitting on Glitchy's head.) * Glitchy Pie: Hi again! (Another yell and high-speed bug-out, this one ranging over meadowlands and up a distant hill, and once again Glitchy takes his time following. High overhead, the unstrung pegasus tiptoes away from a cloud he had used as a hideout and descends to the shore of a small lake. All clear on land, but the water is a different story; up pops a white-maned green head sporting a diving mask and a snorkel. Surfacing a bit farther to expose “floaties” and swim fins on his forelegs, Glitchy spits out the snorkel and props the mask on his forehead.) * Glitchy Pie: I need a favor, Rainbow Beam. (The escapee lets off a cry and rises into the air for his fourth flyaway, but stops himself.) * Rainbow Beam: (resignedly) Oh, forget it. (He flops down.) * Glitchy Pie: I totally promise, it’ll be totally fun! * Rainbow Beam: (sighing) Okay. (Dissolve to the uppermost portion of the pavilion, with Rainbow adjusting the position of a nearby cloud. Two green hooves extend into view from above and below, framing the effort—this is Glitchy's perspective, and the camera cuts to him after a moment. He works his hooves around through several angles, squinching his eyes as well; Rainbow makes adjustments as he calls them out. Glitchy has dried out and disposed of his swimming gear.) * Glitchy Pie: Over to the right!...No, no, a little to the left!...Oh, wait! Back to the right! (Close-up of Rainbow, whose patience is starting to wear thin; he tweaks the cloud right a bit.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Now, a little leftish while staying rightly. (The assistant does his best to follow this one.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Stop! (Back to him.) Hmmm…maybe a few inches to the south! (The roof of the pavilion again.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Now a couple of centimeters north! (Rainbow drags the cloud into view.) Okay, one more smidge-a-meter to the— * Rainbow Beam: GLITCHY PIE!! (Long shot of the pair.) * Glitchy Pie: Uh, I mean, perfect! Now, wait for my signal. (The cloud has ended up almost exactly above the front doors. Glitchy peeks through a window; inside, Mace is collecting an armload of scrolls from a cubbyhole rack and humming the original My Little Pony theme. He exits the pavilion, whereupon Glitchy throws a quick gesture skyward. Rainbow gives the cloud a swift buck, causing a sudden flash of lightning that frightens Mace into dropping his scrolls. As Glitchy leans intently toward him, he stands stock-still for a moment and then begins to hiccup. Rainbow smiles and Glitchy laughs as the cloud brings the former down to the ground. Mace's next three lines are punctuated by hiccups.) * Glitchy Pie: Oh, Rainbow Beam, we startled Mace into getting the hiccups! (Rainbow and Mace laugh as well.) * Mace: Good one, Glitchy Pie! (Cut to him; he continues o.s.) You’re always pulling a fast one on me. (He picks up one of the scrolls, but hiccups a lick of fire over it and yelps in surprise. It vanishes in a wisp of sparkling pink smoke—he has just sent a message to Princess Daylight by mistake.) * Glitchy Pie: Oh, no! You’re not hurt, are you? * Mace: Nah. Don’t be silly. Dragons are fireproof. (Quick pan to Daylight, studying a document on a worktable in the bedchamber of her palace in Canterlot. A few books and scrolls lie on the floor, a low round bed stands behind her, and a fire is burning in the fireplace. The scroll Mace sent materializes and drops to the floor, surprising her considerably. Back to the pavilion.) * Glitchy Pie: Oh…okay. Good. (He and Rainbow trade a smile and start laughing fit to burst, while Mace has rounded up several other scrolls. Another incendiary hiccup burns the lot and leaves him staring haplessly after the inadvertent mass mailing.) * Mace: I wish the same thing were true of scrolls. (Quick pan to Daylight, who now has the first scroll open before her and is not sure what to make of it. She is promptly pelted by all the others at once; in Ponyville, the two tricksters yuk it up as Mace goes after the last few. As soon as he grabs one, it falls victim to a hiccup.) * Glitchy Pie: Have you ever seen anything more hilarious? (He falls back laughing.) * Rainbow Beam: (smiling wickedly) I can think of one thing. (Which is to kick the cloud for another lightning flash that scares a yelp out of Glitchy and leaves him with the hiccups as well. He starts alternating between these and giggles, and his next line is broken up by the former.) * Rainbow Beam: I didn’t take you for a prankster, Glitchy Pie. (He flies down; Glitchy has stood up.) * Glitchy Pie: Are you kidding? I love to pull pranks! It’s all in good fun, and Glitchy Pie looooves to have fun! * Rainbow Beam: You know, Glitchy Pie, you’re not as annoying as I thought. You want to hang out? * Glitchy Pie: (zipping all about) That’d be—I’d really—when do—I mean—when would you— (Rainbow stops him with a hoof over the mouth.) * Rainbow Beam: A simple nod will do. * Glitchy Pie: (nodding) Mmm-hmm. (Rainbow lowers his hoof so the two conspirators can smile at each other. Dissolve to the upper reaches of a structure whose roof is styled as a giant, multicolored court jester’s cap, complete with bells. Tilt down to ground level; the hanging sign, of a laughing pony’s head in jester attire and an “arrow through the head” gag, marks this as a joke/novelty shop. Glitchy and Rainbow exit with full baskets in their teeth. From here, cut to a close-up of the doorbell next to the Carousel Boutique’s door; Glitchy reaches into view to press it. The bell sounds as two phrases of the classic “Westminster Quarters” clock chime pattern. The next two lines are delivered in hushed tones.) * Rainbow Beam: (from o.s.) Is he even home? (Long shot; he and Glitchy are hiding behind bushes a short distance away, having left something on the doorstep.) * Glitchy Pie: I don’t know. This is gonna be gold! (Top half of door opens, exposing Tanzanite as both snicker.) There he is! (They drop out of sight, and Tanzanite looks off to one side before noticing what is on the step.) * Tanzanite: Hmmm! (In close-up, he sniffs at it—a bouquet of flowers—and comes up with a smudge of something on his nostrils. He begins to sneeze uncontrollably and throws a puzzled glance off toward the o.s. jokers’ giggling; quick pan to the pair, now clear of the bushes. Rainbow has a can balanced on his hoof, and a zoom on the picture label reveals it as sneezing powder. As Tanzanite glares toward them, Rainbow drops the can and gallops off, with the effect of causing Glitchy to sneeze himself o.s. as well when he gets a snootful. Tanzanite smiles at the comeuppance.) (A sheet of paper is unrolled over the scene by Sapphire; zoom out to show it as a scroll on a stand in the library’s reading room, with a quill and inkwell nearby. She has set up some flasks and test tubes on the central table, and she levitates one of these and the quill to do a report. The quill rapidly jots down several lines, which vanish from the page as soon as she turns away to mix some of her chemicals, which start to bubble. When she turns back, the sight of the blank paper causes her eyes to pop slightly.) * Sapphire Sparkle: Hmm? (She eyes the mixture, now fuming, then the page—and from behind her come a flash, a few puffs of smoke, and the sounds of exploding chemicals and breaking glass. As she eyes the inkwell suspiciously, she catches the pair’s laughter; outside, Rainbow is holding up a bottle of disappearing ink, which they sneaked into the library. The snookered young scientist throws an “okay, you got me” smile through the window as Glitchy and Rainbow laugh themselves silly and Rainbow drops the bottle.) (Dissolve to a long shot of Sweet Apple Acres, zooming in slowly, then cut to Cherrybelle as she begins to pull a cart out of the barn. The front wheels are barely halfway out before she stops with a sharp, shocked gasp; ahead of her is a tree whose apples look like multicolored Easter eggs. A pan across the orchard reveals that every tree in sight has been similarly affected.) * Cherrybelle: (from o.s.) Land sakes! (Back to her; she hears the yellow goofball laughing and looks confusedly off to each side. Glitchy and Rainbow are nearby, each with a painter’s palette hooked over one hoof and a just-used brush in his teeth. They share a laugh before bailing out due to their own handiwork being thrown at them by one angry blond pony. One apple lands in a full water barrel, in which Cherrybelle's reflection appears as the paint washes away to leave the fruit undamaged. Realizing the joke they have played, Cherrybelle chuckles to herself.) (Dissolve to Flowershy at a stream bend, watching several jumping fish and a few other water-dwellers that gather at the bank. In a close-up pan, one of them can be seen to be an obvious decoy of a turtle, with a long tube attached to its rear and trailing back across the stream. It squeaks a bit, and the camera follows the tube to where it disappears over a hill on the opposite bank. A telescope is extended up from behind; on the far side, Rainbow watches the scene through this while Glitchy jumps up and down. A rubber bulb in his teeth, attached to the other end of the tube, provides the noise.) * Glitchy Pie: Is someone over there? Who are we gonna squirt? Who are we gonna squirt? * Rainbow Beam: (snickering) Flowershy. * Glitchy Pie: What?!? (He spits out the bulb.) No, no, no, no, no, no. We can’t prank Flowershy. I mean, she’s so sensitive. It’ll hurt her feelings, even our most harmless prank. (Rainbow backs up from the scope.) * Rainbow Beam: Yeah, you’re right. (He blows a raspberry and turns to Glitchy.) Huh. We need another victim who’s made of tougher stuff. (He has not noticed Glitchy's struggle to contain a laugh, and now he puts his eye back to the scope for a moment. When he backs off again, a turn of the head tells all: his left eye has a ring of ink around it, left by the scope’s eyepiece.) * Rainbow Beam: So, who’s it gonna be? * Glitchy Pie: Oh! (giggling) I’ve got someone in mind—the toughest around. * Rainbow Beam: Oh, awesome! (looking around) Who, who? Do I know them? (Close-up of the water at the bank; Glitchy’s reflection pops into view, pointing.) * Glitchy Pie: (giggling) Oh, yeah. (Rainbow’s appears alongside.) You’re very close. (After the victim notices his eye, both have a good laugh over the double-cross.) * Rainbow Beam: Good one, Glitchy Pie! (He puts his hoof out for a high five, then yanks it back twice when Glitchy tries to slap it. Another laugh, and the camera tilts up to frame Flowershy across from them; all the real animals have gone, leaving her with the decoy turtle. As the sun begins to set, she cautiously tries to pet it, only to see the head bounce back and forth on its spring, surprising her.) (Dissolve to a stretch of land outside Ponyville proper, near Sweet Apple Acres. It is now sunrise of the following morning. Glitchy trots along, wearing a pair of joke glasses with a big red nose and droopy mustache attached and blowing on a noisemaker. He is also wearing the classic “arrow through the head” over his mane. When he skids to a stop, the camera zooms out to frame him looking up at a house built of clouds and rainbows, sporting a number of Greek-style columns and floating at a very low altitude. A stream of the variegated light spills over the edge as a waterfall.) * Glitchy Pie: Rise and shine, Rainbow Beam! (Close-up of the door; he continues o.s.) It’s a brand new day, and we got a lot of pranking to— (The head that pokes out is not Rainbow’s, but that of a bald eagle with feathers swept forward on top of the head. The tips of these are shaded a pale blue to match the coloration around the green eyes, one of which aims itself toward ground level in a puzzled and slightly hostile glare.) * Glitchy Pie: Ooh! (Rainbow peeks out from the roof, the ink ring gone from his eye.) * Rainbow Beam: Mornin', Glitch! (He drops to ground level and addresses himself upward.) Gilbert, this is my pal Glitchy Pie. (Gilbert descends with a shrill cry, revealing himself as a griffon—brown-furred lion’s body, tail, and hind legs; eagle’s head, wings, and talons on the forelegs. The wings are a darker brown than the body. All of Glitchy's joke items drop to the ground when he gets a good look at the creature, whose male voice and body language practically scream “too hip for the room.”) * Gilbert: Hey, what’s up? * Rainbow Beam: Glitchy, this is my griffon friend Gilbert. * Glitchy Pie: What’s a griffon? (Cut to Gilbert, who spreads his wings in a crouch and jumps toward the camera.) * Rainbow Beam: (from o.s.) He's half eagle, half lion. (Cut to frame all three.) * Gilbert: (throwing wing around Rainbow’s shoulders) And all awesome! (After a playful snarl, he and Rainbow laugh and chatter while trading their particular version of a secret handshake, as the green pony stares with some bewilderment.) * Rainbow Beam: Gilbert's my best friend from my days at Junior Speedster Flight Camp. (to Gilbert) Hey, remember the chant? * Gilbert: Sh’yah. They made us recite it every morning. I’ll never get that lame thing out of my head. * Rainbow Beam: Sooo…? (The griffon meets his big smile with an unenthusiastic little groan.) * Gilbert: Only for you, Beam. (Both rise into the air to do the choreography for the chant—no points for guessing which one would rather be doing anything else.) [Rainbow Beam, Gilbert] - Junior Speedsters are our lives, - Sky-bound soars and daring dives. (landing) - Junior Speedsters, it’s our quest - To someday be the very best! (Glitchy's response is to laugh and stomp one hoof on the ground, prompting both Speedster alumni to turn their heads away in embarrassment for a moment.) * Glitchy Pie: Oh, that was awesome! And it gave me a great idea for a prank! (He shoves his head into the pile of novelties to put them all back in place.) * Glitchy Pie: Gilbert, you game? * Gilbert: Huh. Well, I groove on a good prank as much as the next griffon. (elbowing Rainbow, spreading wings) But, Beam, you promised me we’d get a flying session in this morning. (He lifts off.) * Rainbow Beam: Yeah, uh, well…Glitchy Pie, you don’t mind, do you? (hovering) Gilbert just got here. We’ll catch up with you later. * Glitchy Pie: Oh! Um…well, sure, no problem. Have fun, you guys! (as they zoom off) I’ll, uh, just catch up with you… (He sighs dejectedly and sits back on his haunches.) * Glitchy Pie: …later. (The noisemaker in his mouth sounds off weakly. Snap to black.) Act Two (Opening shot: fade in to a street in Ponyville, with clear sky overhead. Rainbow flies across, doing a loop-the-loop, and Gilbert follows and overtakes the pegasus on a straight run. As Rainbow accelerates, the griffon takes a breather on a cloud, only to get bowled over when Rainbow plows into him. Both laugh and straighten up.) * Gilbert: Whoa! That was sweet, just like old times. * Rainbow Beam: Yeah, only faster! (They bump hoof and talons.) So now what? (Glitchy's head pops up between them, just in time for their second attempted bump to tap both sides of it. He has put away his joke wearables.) * Glitchy Pie: Hey there! (He drops out of sight.) * Rainbow, Gilbert: Huh? (Up again.) * Glitchy Pie: It’s later! (Down, then up.) And I caught up! (A ground-level shot reveals that he is bouncing on a trampoline to reach the cloud.) * Rainbow Beam: (grinning) Glitchy Pie, you are so random! * Gilbert: (pointing) Hey, Beam, think you got enough gas left to beat me to that cloud? * Rainbow Beam: A race? (as both go into a crouch) You are so on! * Gilbert: One, two, three, go! (They take off, leaving the green earth pony to find himself alone on the next bounce.) * Glitchy Pie: Hey! (Tilt up quickly to another cloud; the racers punch up through it at nearly the same instant and stop in midair.) * Rainbow Beam: I win! * Gilbert: As if! I won, dude! * Rainbow Beam: No way! * Gilbert: Yes way. * Rainbow Beam: Oh, come on! I was way ahead of you! * Gilbert: I don’t think so. * Rainbow Beam: Oh, geez, dream on! * Gilbert: Remember back at camp? I— * Rainbow Beam: There is no way you beat me! * Gilbert: Whatever. (They are so absorbed in the argument that they do not notice Glitchy floating up behind them, thanks to the huge bunch of balloons tied around his midsection. His words catch both off guard.) * Glitchy Pie: Wow, guys, that was really close! (to Gilbert) But I think Rainbow Beam beat you by a teeny-weeny, itty-bitty hair—or a teeny-weeny, itty-bitty feather. * Rainbow Beam: Hah! See? Good thing Glitchy Pie’s here to keep you honest, Gil. (On the end of this line, cut to a close-up of Gilbert, who shoots him a rather nasty look before recovering his composure.) * Gilbert: Okay, Beam! (pointing up) Last one to that cloud up there is a gnarly dragon egg. Go! (They take off in a burst of cloud vapor; when it clears, Gilbert is right where he started, having doubled back for a private talk with Glitchy. His voice takes on a decidedly nasty edge.) * Gilbert: I think the high altitude is making you dizzy. (He starts popping one balloon after another with his talons; eventually Glitchy begins to sink and he flies off.) * Glitchy Pie: Wait! Guys! (Rainbow reaches the cloud and looks around for Gilbert, who arrives a moment later. The quiet is broken by the growing sound of chugging machinery and Glitchy's voice.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Wow! You guys almost got away from me that time! (Longer shot. A jerry-built, pedal-powered helicopter is keeping her aloft now. Gilbert throws an irritated glance his way, then turns to Rainbow.) * Gilbert: So, Beam, got any new moves in your trick-tionary, or are you one hundred percent old-school? * Rainbow Beam: New moves? (hovering off cloud) Hah. Sit back, Gil. (flying o.s.) This is gonna take a while. (After he has gone, the griffon turns back to the interloper.) * Gilbert: Hey, Glitchy (beckoning) Come here. (Glitchy maneuvers in.) * Glitchy Pie: Yeah? (Gilbert flies up and grabs the rotor shaft so he can get in the unnerved pilot’s face.) * Gilbert: Don’t you know how to take “get lost” for an answer? Beam doesn’t need to hang with a dweeb like you now that I’m around. You’re dorkin’ up the sky, Stinkie Pie, so make like a bee and BUZZ OFF! (Letting go of the shaft, he seizes the rotor itself to stop it cold and start the whole body spinning instead. Panicked yells from the whirling green blur in the driver’s seat; when Gilbert lets go, the whole rig veers crazily back and forth and spirals down toward the fields.) * Rainbow Beam: (returning to cloud) Try matching that!...Hey! Where’s Glitchy Pie and his crazy contraption? * Gilbert: Eh, she left. Something about being as busy as a bee. (Down on the ground, Glitchy and his machine have wiped out hard. Once he gets his wits about him, he stands up among the wreckage.) * Glitchy Pie: Hmph! (Dissolve to the exterior of the library.) * Sapphire Sparkle: (from inside) So, Glitchy Pie... (Cut to her, looking over a book in the reading room. She flips pages with her magic.) * Sapphire Sparkle: …are you sure that this friend of Rainbow Beam is really so mean? (Glitchy comes up.) * Glitchy Pie: Um, yeah! (pacing) He keeps stealing Rainbow Beam away, he popped my balloons, and he told me to buzz off! I’ve never met a griffon this mean! Well, actually, I’ve never met a griffon at all. (Longer shot; Mace sits on the stairs, reading.) * Glitchy Pie: But I bet if I had, he wouldn’t have been as mean and grumpy as Gilbert! * Sapphire Sparkle: You know what I think, Glitchy Pie? * Glitchy Pie: Hmm? * Sapphire Sparkle: Well, I think…you’re jealous. * Glitchy Pie: Jealous?!? * Mace: Green with envy…well, in your case, literally. * Sapphire Sparkle: Well, yes, jealous. Listen, Glitchy. I don’t want to upset you— (Pan slowly to a crushed Glitchy, putting her o.s.) —but just because Rainbow Beam has another friend doesn’t make Gilbert a grump. I mean, perhaps it’s you, Glitchy— (Longer shot, framing both.) —who needs to improve his attitude. (This idea seems to sit very badly in the brain under the fluffy white mane.) * Glitchy Pie: Improve my attitude? (stammering) But I—but it’s Gilbert that—are you seri— (He gives up on the discussion with a frustrated yell and stalks out, slamming the library door hard enough to shake the whole building. Sapphire sighs as she and Mace trade a very worried glance.) (Cut to Glitchy, walking through the park and thinking very hard.) * Glitchy Pie: Maybe Sapphire is right. Maybe Gilbert isn’t a big mean grumpy mean meanie-pants. Maybe I’m just a big jealous judgmental jealous jealousy-pants. (Sigh.) (Dissolve to a profile close-up of the down-in-the-dumps pony as he sips an ice cream soda, then zoom out to frame him standing at a table outside Sugarcube Corner. The sound of an overhead flight and two unmistakable laughing voices causes him to nearly upset both the table and his drink.) * Gilbert: (from o.s.) That was sweet! * Rainbow Beam: (from o.s.) Ugh. (Zoom out quickly; he and Gilbert fly among the rooftops.) I gotta take care of a few weather jobs around here. Shouldn’t take long. (They land.) Just, uh, hang out in town and I’ll come find you. * Gilbert: That’s cool, I guess. I’m gonna go chow down. * Rainbow Beam: Later! (After he has flown away, Gilbert runs an eye over the scene and notices a produce cart at which Granda Fuzz is checking out ears of corn. Zoom in on this; Gilbert's tail pops up from the display, prompting a terrified scream from the old stallion.) * Grandpa Fuzz: A rattler! A rattler! Run for the hills! Everybody run, save yourselves! (He flees as quickly as his creaky joints will allow—that is, not very—and Gilbert puts his head up behind the display to see his The pegasus in charge of the cart gives him a puzzled look.) * Gilbert: (walking o.s.) This stuff ain’t fresh, dude. (Glitchy, at his table, has seen the whole thing.) * Glitchy Pie: Aw, poor Grandpa Fuzz! He didn’t know it was a joke. How mean!...No, no. I can’t misjudge him. (Cut to Gilbert passing the cart; he continues o.s.) It was kind of a funny prank…I guess? (A look back and forth, and he filches an apple using his tail without being noticed; one fast chomp disposes of the evidence as he continues on. Back to Glitchy, who gasps angrily.) * Glitchy Pie: I did misjudge him! He’s not only a meanie mean-pants, he’s also a thief!...No, no, no, no, no. He might give it back. (Zoom out slightly.) It’s just a joke. (Flowershy backs across the view in front of him, her eyes fixed on a family of ducks she is escorting down the street.) * Flowershy: All right, little ones. This way, this way. Mama Duck, you’re free and clear. (She does not notice Gilbert's approach from the opposite direction until her rump collides with the white-feathered crest.) * Gilbert: Hey! * Flowershy: Please excuse me. * Gilbert: I’m walkin’ here! * Flowershy: (backing up, scared) Oh…um…I’m sorry…I-I-I was just trying to— (Cut to Gilbert on the end of this.) * Gilbert: (mimicking Flowershy's tone) “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” (viciously, advancing; ducks scatter) Why don’t you just watch where you’re going, doofus? * Flowershy: But…b-b-but…I…I… (The griffon sucks in a double lungful of air and lets it out as a deafening roar directly into the meek pegasus’ face. Dead silence except for a sheep’s bleat, which gives way to Flowershy's sobbing as she flees the scene first on hooves and then by wings. Glitchy sees it all, including Gilbert's run up to make sure she is gone.) * Gilbert: Ugh! Please. All these lame ponies are driving me buggy. I gotta bail. (He flies off.) * Glitchy Pie: He’s a grump and a thief and a bully! The meanest kind of mean meanie-pants there is! I can take it, but no one treats Flowershy like that—''no one''! This calls for extreme measures… (Zoom in to an extreme close-up as a fierce smile crosses his face.) * Glitchy Pie: …Glitchy Pie style! (Snap to black.) Act Three (Opening shot: fade in to an extreme close-up of Glitchy, still sporting that same fierce smile. It softens after a moment, and the camera zooms out to show him now standing just inside the front door of Sugarcube Corner, where a full-on shindig is in progress on the shop floor. A pony enters.) * Glitchy Pie: Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! (Pan to Cherrybelle and Tanzanite at the other side of the room.) * Cherrybelle: Who’s this Gilbert I’ve heard nothin’ about? * Tanzanite: I hear he’s an old friend of Rainbow Beam, a griffon. So rare. (They walk off on the end of this, revealing Sapphire and Flowershy behind them.) * Sapphire Sparkle: You’ve met Gilbert, What’s he like? * Flowershy: Oh…um, well…I’ll tell you later, Sapphire. (She approaches Glitchy as more guests arrive.) * Glitchy Pie: (to guests) Welcome! Welcome! * Flowershy: Um, Glitchy Pie, about this party for Gilbert—um, do you really think it’s a good idea? I mean— * Glitchy Pie: Don’t worry your pretty little head about mean old Gilbert. (knocking her on the head) Your uncle Glitchy Pie’s got it all taken care of. (He does not notice that his response has left Flowershy rather vexed, and he turns back toward the door without bothering to hear the next line.) * Flowershy: I’m a year older than you. * Glitchy Pie: (now o.s.) Gilbert! (Quick pan to him just inside; Glitchy jumps over.) I’m so honored to throw you one of my signature Glitchy Pie parties! (holding out hoof to shake) And I really, truly, sincerely hope you feel welcome here amongst all us pony folk. (He ends this line with a big grin as Gilbert reluctantly shakes. What follows is a full-body electric shock that sends the griffon tottering to the floor—and puts an even bigger grin on the green pony’s face. A turn of the hoof reveals a joy buzzer attached to it; he laughs over the stunt as Gilbert gets upright with a scowl. Rainbow’s laughter is heard from o.s., and he trots over to the pair.) * Rainbow Beam: Oh, Glitchy Pie! The old hoof-shake buzzer! You are a scream! (Gilbert forces a smile.) * Gilbert: Yeah. (Chuckle.) Uh, good one, Glitchy Pie. * Rainbow Beam: (trotting off) Come on, Gil. I’ll introduce you to some of my other friends. * Gilbert: Right behind you, Beam! (to Glitchy, menacingly) I know what you’re up to. * Glitchy Pie: (still smiling) Great! * Gilbert: (exasperated groan) I know what you’re planning! * Glitchy Pie: (giggling) Well, I hope so. This wasn’t supposed to be a surprise party. * Gilbert: I mean, I’ve got my eye on you. (Glitchy leans directly into his face.) * Glitchy Pie: And I'' got my eye on ''you. (He bulges his eyes out comically on this line, then backs off o.s. to leave one rather bemused bad boy standing alone.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Everyone… (Cut to him amid the crowd.) …I’d like you all to meet Gilbert— (Back to Gilbert; he continues o.s.) —a long-time, dear friend of Rainbow Beam. (hugging him) Let’s honor him and welcome him to Ponyville. (He zips away; Gilbert shoots a hairy eyeball after him, but quickly trades it in for a smile as the other guests cheer and Rainbow throws a hoof around his shoulders.) * Glitchy Pie: Please help yourself. (Close-up of a bowl of candy, with Gilbert standing behind.) * Gilbert: Vanilla lemon drops! (Zoom out.) Don’t mind if I do. (Tossing one into his mouth he instantly squinches his entire face up in pain as steam sings out in his head and sweat sprays from his face. He promptly lets go with a fiery belch. Glitchy picks up a stick in his teeth so he can roast the marshmallow impaled on it in the flames before they die down.) * Gilbert: HOT!! * Rainbow Beam: Gil! The punch! (Gilbert races past; extreme close-up of a full glass as he grabs it, then of his tight-shut eye as he gulps hastily. Liquid is heard running, but when his eye opens in surprise, the camera zooms out to show that the punch is in fact leaking out of a hole in the glass. Laughter from o.s.) * Gilbert: Huh? (Overhead shot; several onlookers are getting their yuks in.) * Glitchy Pie: Well, what do you know? Pepper in the vanilla lemon drops, and the punch served in a dribble glass! * Rainbow Beam: (chuckling) Priceless. Priceless! (He laughs as Gilbert zips across the room and successfully downs another glass, gasping for breath.) * Gilbert: (sarcastically) Yeah. Hilarious. * Rainbow Beam: (from o.s.) Hey, Gil! (Cut to him by a table stacked with gifts.) Look! Presents! (Greed brings the griffon over in a trice. He grabs one and pulls its ribbon with his beak, only to have a mass of toy snakes pop out in his face—the old “snake can” trick, which leaves him dazed and disheveled. More laughter.) * Cherrybelle: (to Tanzanite) Spittin’ snakes! (laughing) Somepony pulled that prank on me last month. * Gilbert: Ha, ha. I bet I know who that was. (Quick pan to Glitchy.) * Glitchy Pie: You do? (Dissolve to another area of the room, where Flowershy has a group of birds lined up on a ledge and is directing them in a song. Pan across the lively gathering, then cut to Glitchy at a cake loaded with lit candles.) * Glitchy Pie: Cake time, everypony! (Zoom out; he is pushing the cake on a wheeled platform to the center of the floor. Mace is now seen among the guests.) * Mace: Hey! Can I blow out the candles? * Sapphire Sparkle: Why don’t we let Gilbert blow out the candles, Mace? He is the guest of honor, after all. (Gilbert flashes over, elbowing Mace away. His feathers are back in order.) * Gilbert: Exactly! (He takes a deep breath, blows out all the candles—and then is greatly perplexed to see them all relight themselves. Another try leaves him slightly winded and earns a round of laughs when the wicks blaze back up. Several more attempts get the same result.) * Mace: (laughing) Relighting birthday candles! I love that prank! What a classic! * Glitchy Pie: Now I wonder who could’ve done that? * Gilbert: (very snarky) Yeah. I wonder. (The sound of Mace's o.s. gobbling draws his attention; at ground level, he has tunneled so far into the cake that his tail disappears into the hole.) * Mace: (muffled by cake) Who cares? This cake is amazing! (He pops out through the top on the end of this, scattering frosting and candles everywhere.) * Sapphire Sparkle: Mace! * Mace: What? It’s great! Try some. (This bit of gluttony starts to work Gilbert's last good nerve as Rainbow comes over.) * Rainbow Beam: Hey, Gil, you’re not upset about some silly candles, are you? (Gilbert composes himself.) * Gilbert: No way, Beam. Like I said, I’m down with a good prank. * Rainbow Beam: (zipping to cake) Come on, then. Let’s have some cake. (The beaked jerk’s mood goes sour again and does not improve when Glitchy starts chomping into the cake. A set of talons wraps itself around his neck and drags him behind for an uncomfortably close sidebar.) * Gilbert: Hey, I’m watching you like a hawk. * Glitchy Pie: Why? Can’t you watch me like a griffon? * Cherrybelle: (from o.s.) Hey, y’all! (Both pop up, grinning broadly; Gilbert looking rather strained.) It’s Pin the Tail on the Pony! (Overhead view of the group; she is near the door, a paper pony tail lies before her, and a drawing of the tailless animal is tacked up on the wall.) * Cherrybelle: Let's play! * Tanzanite: Oh, my favorite game! Can I go first? Can I have the purple tail? (Gilbert leaps over and snatches it up.) * Gilbert: Well, I'' am the guest of honor, and ''I’ll have the purple tail. (Cut to Glitchy and Mace.) * Glitchy Pie: Yeah! Gilbert should definitely go first. (Mace produces a blindfold and walks over.) Let’s get you blindfolded. * Gilbert: (from o.s.) Hey! (Back to him; Mace ties the cloth over his eyes and jumps off his back.) * Gilbert: What are you doing? (A snarl; Glitchy grabs hold and gives a heave that sets him spinning, then backs out of view.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) We’re spinning you around and around, and then you can pin the tail on the pony. (On the second half of this, cut to the picture. Back to Glitchy, now guiding Gilbert toward it.) * Glitchy Pie: Now just walk straight ahead and pin the tail. * Gilbert: (mockingly) “Now just walk straight ahead and pin the tail.” (normal voice; snort) Yeah, right. This is another prank, isn’t it? (walking away from wall) I’m going this way. * Glitchy Pie: Wait! The poster is this— (One taloned foot comes down in a splotch of frosting to send him skidding and yelling across the room, straight through the batwing doors leading into the kitchen. The resulting crash shakes the entire bakery, and as clouds of flour puff out, he emerges a weary, bleary wreck, smeared with cake and various other sweet stuff; The blindfold is off, and the tail hangs across his beak like a mustache.) * Glitchy Pie: (from o.s.) Uh, Gilbert? You pinned the tail on the wrong end. (The ensuing round of laughter is the very last straw for the luckless griffon, who throws off all the gunk with a bellowing roar and hovers above the crowd.) * Gilbert: This is your idea of a good time? I’ve never met a lamer bunch of dweebs in all my life! And Glitchy Pie…''you''! (pointing in Glitchy's face, then leaning to him) You are King Lame-o with your weak little party pranks! Did you really think you could make me lose my cool? (sliding to Rainbow) Well, Beam and I have ten times as much cool as the rest of you put together! (Rainbow’s face hardens.) Come on, Beam. (walking to door) We’re bailing on this pathetic scene. (The pegasus does not stir a hoof even as his old friend stops at the door.) * Gilbert: Come on, Rainbow Beam! I said, we’re leaving! (Not a single face is smiling anymore, even Glitchy.) * Rainbow Beam: You know, Gilbert, I'' was the one who set up all those “weak” pranks at this party. (''Direct hit.) * Gilbert: What?! * Glitchy Pie: Ooh! * Rainbow Beam: So I guess I’m King Lame-o. * Gilbert: Come on, Beam! You’re joshing me! * Rainbow Beam: They weren’t all meant for you specifically. It was just dumb luck that you set them all off. * Glitchy Pie: (smiling, to Mace) I shoulda known! That dribble cup had Rainbow Beam written all over it. * Gilbert: No way! I-It was Glitchy Pie! He set up this party to trip me up, to make a fool of me! * Glitchy Pie: (surprised) Me? I threw this party to improve your attitude. (turning his head until his face is upside down) I thought a good party might turn that frown upside down. * Rainbow Beam: And you sure didn’t need any help making a fool of yourself. You know, this is not how I thought my old friends would treat my new friends. If being cool is all you care about… (Close-up of Gilbert; zoom in as he continues o.s.) …maybe you should go find some new cool friends someplace else. (The recipient of this tongue lashing snarls to himself and spreads his wings.) * Gilbert: Yeah? Well…you…you…you are such an…a flip-flop! Cool one minute and lame the next. (walking out) When you decide not to be lame anymore, give me a call. (The door slams and his shrill cry is heard to mark his departure.) * Rainbow Beam: Not cool. * Mace: Wow. Talk about a party-pooper. (General murmurs of agreement.) * Rainbow Beam: I’m sorry, everypony, for bringing Gilbert here. I didn’t know how rude he was. And, Glitchy Pie, I’m really sorry he ruined that awesome party you put on for him. * Glitchy Pie: (smiling) Hey, if you want to hang out with party-poopers, that’s your business. * Rainbow Beam: I’d rather hang out with you. (holding out hoof to shake) No hard feelings? * Glitchy Pie: No hard feelings. (When they shake, both of them get a jolt that starts the whole crowd laughing—and they join in, turning over their hooves to reveal a joy buzzer on each.) * Sapphire Sparkle: Hey, Glitchy. Sorry I accused you of misjudging Gilbert. Looks like I’m the one who misjudged you. (Glitchy puts a foreleg around her shoulders.) * Glitchy Pie: It’s okay, Sapphire. Even you can’t be a super-smart smarty smart-pants all the time. (to the crowd, rearing/jumping excitedly) Come on, everypony! There’s still a whole lotta party to finish! (Laughter and cheers as the camera cuts to a close-up and zoom in on Sapphre, who smiles thoughtfully.) * Sapphire Sparkle: (voice over, dictating) “Dearest Princess Daylight: …” (Slow pan through the party.) “Today I learned that it’s hard to accept when somepony you like wants to spend time with somepony who’s not so nice.” (Dissolve to Daylight's bedchamber, near the fireplace, and pan toward her bed. A wisp of smoke flows in through an air vent and forms into a scroll, which unrolls in midair to reveal both Sapphire's message and a bottle of ink. These settle down to float in front of Daylight, who is sitting atop the bed on her belly.) * Sapphire Sparkle: (voice over) “Though it’s impossible to control who your friends hang out with, it is possible to control your own behavior. Just continue to be a good friend. In the end, the difference between a false friend and one who is true will surely come to light.” (The scroll rolls up and floats away, and a blank one takes its place as a quill floats over.) * Sapphire Sparkle: (voice over) “Your faithful student, Sapphire Sparkle.” (It dips in the ink and starts writing.) * Princess Daylight: (voice over) “Dear Sapphire Sparkle, my most faithful student: …” (A close-up of the parchment reveals that the writing is quickly fading away. Zoom in on the bottle, whose label peels off to expose it as the same disappearing ink that Glitchy and Rainbow used on Sapphire earlier.) * Princess Daylight: (from o.s.) Oh! (Laugh; cut to frame her.) Wrong ink. (She sighs contentedly and chuckles, levitating another inkwell over to herself and starting the letter again. Zoom out slowly and fade to black.) End of episode. Category:FIM (PP6's version) episodes Category:FIM (PP6's version) Season 1 episodes Category:FIM (PP6's version) episodes focusing on Rainbow Beam Category:FIM (PP6's version) episodes focusing on Glitchy Pie